Me in my paramedic jacket. I enjoy my job and hope to get back to it soon.
It’s 9 July at 08.45.
Good morning, everyone.
Today’s the day when I find out if I will be given back my freedom and can try and get back to some normality.
I’m pleased to say I coped pretty well last night with my mixture of emotions, and took myself off to bed as soon as any feelings started to spiral out of control. Again I felt proud that I dealt with my feelings effectively, without being self-destructive, which has helped keep the spring in my step.
Rudeness!
My consultant asked me to return to the hospital ward this morning to see her at 09.30. On my arrival, the nursing staff asked if I could stay on the ward as my consultant now wanted to see me at 12.30. I feel so frustrated at the way healthcare professionals just change their appointments at the drop of a hat without consulting you. Andrew came with me to the hospital for the 09.30 appointment for support, and sadly has had to go to work and can’t return at 12.30 due to work commitments. He has taken so much time off work over the years to look after me and the girls so I can’t be disappointed at him for not being with me today. My disappointment and frustration is aimed at the people working for the NHS and how rude and inconsiderate they can be.
Sedation
My nerves about this afternoon’s tribunal feel overwhelming just now. Now I’m at the hospital I can feel myself heading towards avoidance to deal with these feelings by asking the nursing staff for sedative medication (service-users would know this as PRN).
More later…
Please believe me | Angela's law 
Dear Angela
Just to say how much I am thinking of you during these dreadful days.
I cannot comprehend the actions of the authorities, nor their behaviours, which in every respect surely contravene Human Rights?
Sadly, when the truth emerges from such atrocities that you and other survivors have endured, people and organisations behave badly.
Rather than face the reality and do the decent thing, they spiral into aggressive and abusive behaviour and enact the kind of secondary abuse you are having to deal with – they commit this upon the very person who is innocent…
I have to hope that things change radically and that this nightmare comes to an end and you are free to continue to live the good life you have built for you and your family from the darkest depths.
Courage to you from me and all who care.
Anne xxxxx